Just a little high

Well friends...it's been a little while since I blogged. Sorry about that....it's been a rough week.

First, I threw my wallet away. Not on purpose, of course.
So, I went dumpster diving. Behind McDonalds. In a cute shirt & jeans.

But no luck...

This guy isn't me, but it could have been...what an adventure.

Then, I got a kidney stone. Third one in a year. Wowzers. Actually, "got" is the incorrect tense. I have one currently as I am writing. And I am a little high on some pretty strong pain meds, along with some anti-nausea & antibiotics.

Unless....

In Our Younger Years

Because I think you need to meet the Joel & I that we first met.....introducing us in 3rd grade.

Here is my adorable husband as an 8-year old.

And here I am! This is actually right before I got glasses

that rivaled Joel's in coolness-quotient.

Hmmm....I wonder what our kids are going to look like. Probably a bunch of dark-hair, dark-eyed cuties. Probably.

And here we are a few years ago -- I love this picture of us.

They laugh at the days to come.

(just a slight modification of the verse, right?)

Most of you know the story that Joel & I met in 3rd grade in Kenya while his parents were studying Kiswahili there during that year....and then we met again in a bookstore 16 years later...

For three years after we met we didn't interact, weren't friends. We graduated from college & reconnected through the missions program at our alma mater. 9 months after we started dating we were standing at an altar.

What a glorious story.

A story only One author could write.

And He is still writing it....

I am not big enough

Thanks to everyone who has interacted with me on the questions I had during my last post...I would love to hear anyone else's thoughts. All of you have been encouraging and challenging my heart.

I think that this is the conclusion I have come to as I have thought & prayed about these and other questions:

"I am not big enough"

I am not strong enough, brave enough....

I think that God has so kindly but surely exposed a thought in my heart that was deep & unknown. I have thought I could hack the missions field because I am a MK (missionary kid). A few months ago I was reading a story about some missionaries serving in Chad.

Chad.

Like the really desolate place in Africa.

That has deserts.

And the female missionaries have to wear skirts and head coverings.

I remember thinking "there is no way I could hack that".

And the truth is that I can't. I need Jesus. I need the Loving & Good Shepherd of my heart to lead me there & take care of me.

It's a simple thought, but one that is shaking me to the core.

I must decrease, but He must increase.

The Journey

Engagement picture nearly 5 years ago...

Each day that passes Joel & I step closer to the mission field our hearts long so much for. In a little over 100 days we will leave on a plane to spend three wonderful months serving in Kenya. We can't wait! So much to be done between now and February 1st:

- Joel will rotate at several locations that we are considering for residency

- We will pack up our house & move it all into storage

- We still have just a "few" ;) dollars to raise towards our trip

I am writing this sitting in a cafe in Wichita, Kansas - visiting Joel during one of those aforementioned rotations. He is working in a pediatric clinic today - I am exploring this fun little city....

Of course, the exploration hasn't been too overwhelming.

Found a coffee shop I like.

Yep, that's about the sum total of the exploring today :)

There are so many thoughts in my heart/head about Joel's & my future (grammar? why don't I just say "our" future? So much easier, so much more boring. Plus, while our futures are intertwined they will still be experienced differently). I wish I could take time and really write them out, but I think I am still unsure about this blogging thing.

Truth be told, I blog because I hope that there will be people out there who care to know about our journey towards the field. Who will be interested in what it means to hear His voice & really follow it.

But then I wonder if there really are those people, and I don't really need to blog for my own sake - that's what I journal for.

Or maybe I do.

Well, here are a few of those head thoughts/ potential future blogging material:

- I wonder if I will be ready for the missions field. I have spent so long in the comfort of the U.S., will I really be okay with picking out sticks and worms from my beans before I cook them? Do I have what it takes to live a fairly consistently uncomfortable life?

- What is the role of suffering in our Kingdom walk? How does the reality of God's grace, love & shepherding intertwine with "in this world you will have trouble"?

- How can I be intentional in the years remaining (3-4ish) until we finally have that one way ticket?

- Am I being called in by the siren song of American culture in a way that supersedes the Shepherd's voice in my heart?

And so I ponder. But I would love to hear your thoughts on any of these musings too.

Come, let us reason together.

Pain De Provence

It is pretty busy season in the Watson household. Joel is spending the next two months doing lots of traveling to various potential residencies & elective rotations. Thankfully, I get to see him on the majority of weekends, and I have found some awesome new blogs (check out the blogroll to the right) to keep me company in the meantime!

Joel was able to come home this weekend, which he did to watch our dog so that I could attend the Believer's Church women's retreat.*Small time out: okay, when I was growing up we always had people who lived at our house. So, when we left for vacations, etc. we never had to "find someone to take care of the dogs" - there were always people there! So, having to actually PLAN for the dog is such a strange a foreign concept. I mean, come on - it's a dog! But it belongs to us, and so we plan. This concludes the time out*

Aforementioned dog.

Part of Joel coming home was a wonderful, extended "date" where we got to bake "pain de provence" - a traditional French bread FULL of herbs. 1/2 a cup, to be exact, of a mix of fennel, sage, basil, savory, marjoram and some other stuff probably. It was a frightening green, but turned out pretty delicious.

Check it out.

And so it begins. Please notice the clear glass which has the "poolish" (we learned all sorts of new words during this process, as you shall see). This is a mix of yeast, flour & water made at least 8 hours before-hand.

This will become bright green bread.

More mixing. Yes, that is a washer & dryer we are using as countertop.

Mixing in the "herb de provence". Please note the professional knife-gripping.

Joel's patented & awesome kneading technique. Works amazingly.

While the bread is rising, Joel takes a minute to switch out the heater filter. Yes, why it must be accessed this way doesn't make any sense to us either.

After the first rising we had to "degas" it. Hmmm, also a new word to us.

The dough rising again. Thanks for the pretty bowl Marcy Leute.

Waiting patiently. As you can see, it's dark now. Three risings = 7 hours later.

Baking. Please note the pan of water underneath by which we created steam & therefore a perfect crust. Yes, we are professional. Don't hate.

YAY! We did it!

Wow. That's green. *Don't hate on the Country Crock. To each his own & we didn't have any butter* :)

But, still good! :) Nearly midnight, and the bread is done - enjoying it with some butter.

It's such a wonderful time in our marriage, which could seem odd since Joel is gone so much, but God is really blessing this season. I am grateful.